Fighting Fire with Fire
by Master Argus
Summary: After thinking over their previous battles, Brick devises a plan to destroy the Powerpuff Girls once and for all. Oneshot. Distant prequel to Against the Abomination.


Brick, Boomer and Butch began unpacking and setting up their room at Mojo Jojo's lair. Now that Mojo had obtained sole custody of the Rowdyruff Boys, they would be staying with the mad monkey for the next eleven years or so. With the legal battles over, perhaps the Jojo family could make this setup work.

"How are you Boys enjoying taking up residence in my place of dwelling as opposed to the place of dwelling inhabited by HIM?" Mojo asked as he walked by the Boys' bedroom door.

"It's alright." Butch replied. His brothers nodded in agreement.

"Excellent!" Mojo glanced at the clock. "I would assist you in arranging your bedroom, but seeing how it is approaching 3 o'clock, I, Mojo Jojo, must retreat to my laboratory to devise a scheme to destroy the Powerpuff Girls." He smiled at his sons. "You are welcome to join me."

Brick thought about it for a moment, but decided against it. "Sorry, but we got a lot of unpacking to do. Maybe later."

Mojo's smile faded. "Suit yourselves." he said as he left for his lab.

Boomer turned to his red brother, a look of slight confusion on his face. "Why aren't we helping him, Brick? Don't you want to destroy the Powerpuff Girls, too?"

"Of course I do, stupid!" Brick backhand slapped Boomer. "But considering his track record, he's not gonna come up with anything good."

"You're one to talk." Butch stated. "Face it, Brick. None of your plans have worked, either. The closest we ever got was by brute force."

"Yeah, that was a good day." Boomer agreed, then a disgusted look crept onto his face. "Until their cooties got us." He and Butch stuck their tongues out and gagged.

Brick, on the other hand, thought back over their early battles with the Powerpuff Girls. Each time, they'd been defeated by the Girls' cheap tricks, then HIM would give them a spell or vaccine to take away their weaknesses. Now it was unlikely the Girls' kisses would have any physical effect on the Boys. It was honestly pathetic how the Boys needed so much extra help but still never won. It's not like the Girls ever…

Something clicked in Brick's head. "Guys, I think I have an idea."

* * *

The Rowdyruff Boys stood at the edge of a freeway overpass as Brick zipped up his pants zipper. "There, that oughta get their attention."

"Ugh, I don't like this plan." Boomer said, then spat a loogie at a car, shattering its back window. "It's disgusting."

"I know, but if it works, the Powerpuff Girls will be gone forever."

"Gone… forever…?" Butch mumbled to himself while overlooking the passing cars. Before he could say anything more, he and his brothers heard three familiar streaks of light flying in from behind.

"Alright, just like we practiced." Brick whispered to the other two. The Powerpuff Girls descended, floating just above the pavement behind the Boys.

"Hold it right there, Rowdyruff Boys!" Blossom shouted.

"Blossom, Blossom, Blossom…" Brick shrugged, still facing away from her. "Why are we always fighting like this?"

Blossom raised her left eyebrow. "…What?"

Brick, Boomer and Butch then turned around to face their Powerpuff counterparts. Brick smiled a flirtatious smile at Blossom. Boomer and Butch followed suit, shooting flirty looks at Bubbles and Buttercup respectively.

"Why can't we just… be nice to each other?" Brick slowly floated up to Blossom.

"W-what are you talking about?" Blossom asked, frozen with a look of utter confusion on her face.

"I'm talking about this…" Brick leaned in, rested his hand on her shoulder and kissed her on the cheek.

_Alright, let's get this over with._ Butch thought as he approached Buttercup. His counterpart floated there with the same flustered look as her sister. Butch gave her a quick peck.

As Boomer closed in on Bubbles, he noticed that her face had turned slightly red, and it looked like she was suppressing a smile. Boomer was perplexed by it, but wrote it off as Bubbles being weird. He simply closed his eyes and kissed her.

The Rowdyruff Boys floated back a little to see the Girls' reactions. This was it! The Boys had finally defeated the Powerpuff Girls. They hovered there watching the Girls, eagerly awaiting the moment when they would succumb to the Boys' cooties and explode.

Except… that didn't happen. All the Boys saw was Blossom quizzically staring at Brick, Buttercup glaring and clenching her teeth at Butch, and Bubbles looking away from Boomer with her hands covering her mouth, her face beet-red.

"Di-did you just try to…?" Blossom began.

"What?!" Brick interjected. "Why didn't you explode?!"

"Oh, I'm gonna explode alright!" Buttercup shouted. She then rushed Butch and tackled him to the ground. The two began wailing on each other as they always did.

Bubbles' eyes widened and she turned to face Boomer. "You mean, you were just…" Her lips began to tremble, then she scowled at Boomer and slapped him across the face. Boomer retaliated with an uppercut to her chin.

"Guess we're doing this the old fashioned way." Brick flew at Blossom and kicked her. Blossom dodged and shot back with her laser eyes.

After several minutes of exchanging blows, the Powerpuff Girls emerged victorious as usual. The Rowdyruff Boys stepped back and glared at their female counterparts.

"I don't get it." Brick said. "You never got HIM's cootie vaccine. Why didn't my plan work?"

Blossom sighed and shook her head. "You still think cooties are a thing? Grow up, Brick. You're never gonna beat us thinking like that."

Brick grumbled at her. "Fine, but we will destroy you one day. Mark my words." With that, he and his brothers retreated back to Mojo Jojo's lair.

* * *

"Great plan, Brick." Butch sarcastically taunted his brother as they floated into Mojo's foyer. "Absolutely brilliant. We won't be seeing anymore of the Powerpuff Girls, that's for sure."

"Oh, shut up, Butch!" Brick retorted. "I don't see you coming up with anything."

"That's 'cause we don't need plans. It's strength that wins battles."

"Give it a rest, guys." Boomer interjected. "We'll get 'em next time."

"Let's hope so." Butch agreed. "Anyway, I'm gonna go brush my teeth for a couple hours."

"Yeah, me too." Boomer stuck out his tongue. "You comin', Brick?"

Brick thought about it for a second and decided against it. "Babies." he said while rolling his eyes. As his brothers floated over to the bathroom, Brick hovered there thinking back to the battle. As much as he hated to admit it, both Blossom and Butch had a point. His plans thus far hadn't been any more successful than those of Mojo or HIM or Princess What's-Her-Face or any of Townsville's other villains. But Brick knew that he and his brothers were better than them. In the past, the Rowdyruff Boys had come closer than anyone else to destroying the Powerpuff Girls. Perhaps they could do so again.

If Brick was ever to defeat the Girls, he would have to stop thinking like a child. He'd also have to be able to outwit Blossom, the Girls' cunning, intelligent leader. Brick cringed after accidentally complimenting his arch-nemesis, then floated over to Mojo's bookshelf. He grabbed a copy of Sun Tzu's _The Art of War_. After blowing off the dust (Had Mojo even read this?), he sat down on the couch and started reading.

* * *

While Buttercup was in the bathroom washing her face and Blossom was in the Professor's lab training, Bubbles floated to the back of her closet. As she often did after a battle or when something interesting happened to her, she grabbed her favorite toy, Octi, and told him all about it. Today she had quite a story for him.

"So get this. We went to stop the Rowdyruff Boys today. And then they kissed us!" Bubbles smiled, then it quickly faded. "But then it turned out they were just trying to blow us up. I thought for a second Boomer might've…" Bubbles sighed. "I probably would've exploded if Brick or Butch did it. But, well, you know how I feel about Boomer." She rubbed the cheek Boomer had kissed, her smile returning. "I keep hoping that one day they'll turn good so we can be together. Do you think it'll ever happen?"

Octi simply stared back at her, saying and doing nothing.

"Yeah, I know you're just a stuffed animal, but I don't know who else to talk to about this. And it's not like I can keep a diary when my sisters have X-ray vision."

"Y'know, they also have super-hearing." Bubbles' face went blank. She slowly turned her head and saw Buttercup standing next to the door frame, smirking at her.

"H-how much did you hear?" Bubbles managed to squeak out.

"Pretty much the whole thing." Buttercup answered. "So, got a crush on the enemy, huh? Take it from me, that's not gonna end well."

"Please don't tell anyone!"

"I dunno. Blossom might find it interesting."

Bubbles sighed, knowing full well where her green sister was headed with this. "I'll… give you my allowance. For the next month."

"Deal." Buttercup shook Bubbles' hand and agreed. Bubbles sighed again. Hopefully this would all be worth it someday.


End file.
